Tales of Woe

Tragically, the other day my deodorant stopped working halfway through its life span. Luckily, when I went to the store there was a lady standing in the aisle whose job it was to open whichever deodorant I wanted, take out the plastic block, roll it up, and stick it next to my nose so I could make sure it smelled good before I bought it.

Last night I had a dream that Steph was going into labor and that I was in a wheelchair. I’m not really sure what I’ve been eating or drinking, but I’ve been having weird dreams lately.

The following is a selection of bits of random conversations I have had with people in the past couple months. Taken out of context some of them sound a little odd, but I can assure you they sounded just as odd to me within the context. I would also like to note that I do not want to insult any Peruvians who may happen to be reading this blog; I just thought these comments were worth noting.
Forewarning: all the following conversations and responses take place in Spanish, except for Any Random Peruvian on the Street and Sample Peruvian 2.

Any Random Peruvian on the Street: Hello!

Me: Blah Blah Blah…
Sample Peruvian 1: So, you’re not from here are you.
Sample Peruvian 2: Do yoo espeek eengleesh?
Sample Peruvian 3: So, do you like going to the movies?
Sample Peruvian 4: Would you like to come play poker?

Me: Can you teach me how to read palms too?
Peruvian: You have pretty hands.

(Reference: for those who don’t know, “guapa chica” means “attractive girl”)
Me: Good afternoon, how are you?
Taxi Driver: You’re my first passenger of the night, how lucky I am to have such a guapa chica in my car!
Me: That comment wasn’t necessary. I don’t believe you.
Taxi Driver: Why don’t you believe that you’re guapa?
Me: I’m not answering that question.
Taxi Driver: You’re the only girl I’ve ever met who doesn’t think she’s guapa!

Peruvian of the male species: So, do you have a boyfriend?
Me: No.
Peruvian o.t.m.s.: And why does a girl as pretty as you not have a boyfriend?
WARNING: If anyone else uses that line on me, there will be bad consequences. Probably consisting of me rolling my eyes and walking away.

My Peruvian parents trying to teach me some dance moves: Wow, you actually move pretty well for a gringa!
Me: ….Thank you?

Anyway I realize this entry is a little bit pointless, but I felt like stalling my homework a leetle bit longer, and this was the product of my procrastination. Eventually I'll post the last of the pictures from my trip, so if you're not too bored of reading about my life, feel free to sit at your computer and obsessively refresh the page until I update this blog again! Sank you.